Monday, July 1, 2013

Tales From The Crypt "And All Through The House" (1989)

Ho Ho Ho Kiddies!

I was not expecting this episode so soon, why you may ask, well let me tell you a story.  At age 9, I watched a marathon of TFTC, on that day And All Through The House was one I watched and it scared the shit out of me.  I was 9, I was still on the brink of thinking Santa was real, so seeing Santa kill people probably wasn't the best thing for me to see.  I then proceed to sleep with a Chucky doll by my bed, until after Christmas, because this was also the year that Son of Chucky came out and in the trailer, it featured Chucky killing Santa.  Have you finished laughing at me yet?  Yes?  Good, now on to the show!

"A little terror tale chock full of holiday fear, I mean cheer, of course"

Crypt Clause opens the show this week, yes Crypt Keeper is dressed up like Santa, and the costume might be creepier than the normal Crypt Keeper.

While Nat King Cole serenades us in the background we pan through a house decorated with Christmas décor.  In the windows around the house, we see that outside it is snowing, adding an even cheerier ambiance to our setting.  As we continue to pan through the house we land on a couple, a man reading A Christmas Story, and a women tending to a fire place.

"Merry Christmas you son of a bitch"
However things go a bit awry, when the wife picks up the fire poker and bashes him over the head with it.  The wife's daughter, Carrie, comes downstairs, so she can meet Santa, Carrie says that she saw him outside, but her mom puts her back to bed.  The woman, Elizabeth, goes downstairs and makes a call, and then proceeds to put a bag, with a bow on it, over her husbands head.
"And a very Happy New Year"
Elizabeth dons her jacket, and ventures out in the snow, dragging her husband, Joseph's body, while complaining about how much he ways.  Once she's out of the house, a news bulletin cuts through on the radio, stating that a patient from the Pleasantville Institute for the Criminally Insane has escaped, and that the police have confirmed that he is wearing a Santa costume.  Hmm, I wonder which Santa, Carrie saw through her window?
Somehow Joe is still alive and attacks Elizabeth, she's tries to reach for an axe that was in a tree stump, but fails, but its ok, because he ends up passing out, or actually dying this time, who knows.  Bells ring in the distance, distracting Elizabeth, to question out "whose there", when no one answers she turns back around to focus on Joe, but runs into Santa with an axe.  Elizabeth finally gets away, back into the house, successfully with the axe, and tries to call 911, but remembers that she killed her husband and hangs up.  I'd like to point out that there is a killer on the loose and she could easy make it seem like the killer did it, not her.
They play a little cat and mouse game through the windows, before the phone starts ringing, Elizabeth hesitates to answer, when what looks to be a tire swing come through the window.  The fight continues, until Elizabeth get the axe and hits Santa in the head with it and him falling over.  The phone begins to ring again, and its the police telling her that a crazy had escaped and that a policemen would be at her house within 20 minutes.  Elizabeth starts freaking out, but then comes up with the idea to say that Santa killed her husband, no shit.
Upstairs we see Carrie in bed, asleep, panning over to her windows we see that her window is open.  Back downstairs, Elizabeth ventures outside with the axe, using an umbrella bucket to keep the door open.  While putting a few chops into  Joe, the umbrella bucket tips over, locking the door.  When the bucket fell, Carrie awakens, thinking Santa's here, and checks for Santa through her window, but doesn't see him.  We now know that Santa is still alive, and out to kill.  Elizabeth, who is still outside, is checking Joe over for a spare key, she eventually finds one, and heads back inside.  Inside Elizabeth decides to call the cops again, and start making her story up, she checks outside again, and sees that the axe is no longer in Joes head.
She gets on the phone with the operator and the operator tells her to keep safe, and find a weapon.  Elizabeth hurries to get Joe's gun out of the closet, but the door closes behind her, she pulls on the doorknob and the doorknob falls out.  A ladder is placed against the window in the closet, and we see Santa climbing up it, Carrie has the window open ready for him.  Elizabeth finally breaks the door open and runs to Carrie's room to find the room empty. 

"Naughty or Nice?"

Downstairs we hear Carrie call out to Elizabeth, who rushes down the stairs, relieved when she sees that Carrie is alone.  At least is seemed like she was, until she pulls him out from behind the clock, hand in hand.  The episode wraps with Santa saying 'Naughty or Nice?' and Elizabeth screaming.

The End

 I would like to state that it took me 10 minutes to push the start button, contemplating if I wanted to actually watch it again.  10+ years and this episode still freaks me out.  However it is an awesome episode!
Hope you all have a great night!

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